You Think You Got Problems?

You think you got it rough?  Working 45 hours a week of night shifts at the local Friendly's restaurant,  picking up you kids from day care and dropping them off at your in-laws for another three hours so you can catch an extra shift down at Sunglass Hut.  Well I got news for you Mr. and Mrs. Whiny Fucking American, Paris is actually going to do one whole year of probation for pleading guilty to felony drugcharges.  One whole year, 365- 24 hour days people.  Let's all offer her our sincerest support and help getting through this troubling and trying experience.

Paris Hilton will face a Las Vegas, Nevada, judge Monday morning to accept a plea deal in her cocaine possession case, the prosecutor and a source close to the defense said.


As first reported by the Las Vegas Review-Journal, Hilton will avoid jail for last month's cocaine arrest on the Las Vegas strip.

The socialite-actress will enter guilty pleas on two misdemeanor counts, instead of a felony drug charge, the Las Vegas Review-Journal reported.

The original felony charge of cocaine possession will be dropped

Hilton, 29, will get two six-month jail terms, which would be suspended, according to the agreement. She would serve one year on probation.

The newspaper quoted  District Attorney David Roger saying the plea deal "would give us complete control over her future." Saying that a year's probation is giving John Law complete control over Paris's life is like the time you told your prom date in back of the limo that there's no way she can get pregnant from you from unprotected sex cause you always warm up your PB&J's in the microwave and place your sperm sac right in front....See, there's no way, so let me in your crotch and drink another hard lemonade drunk girl. I nuked my sperm for this, I'm gettun some.  same very situation.