12/9/09
Lingerie Football Help Wanted Ad- You Can Be Their Next Bobby Bowden
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In our never ending quest to rid this country from the unsightly scourge of Depression,
...I've never understood the fascination with lingerie football, and I'm a smut peddler...we here at Bbtn like to present you the faithful reader with new and unique opportunities of employment.
Today's help wanted ad: Football Coach for the Lingerie Football League. I know it's not Florida State, but hey, at least it's something to do with football related activities. Plus you'd be working around whiny hot girls all day trying to explain to them the difference between a button hook and a coat hook. Or an Out Pattern and a pastel pattern.
-Must have in depth experience in football whether by coaching or professional play.
-Very interested in Ex- NFL Players or Retired NFL Players (Maurice Clarrett are you listening, you're probably not busy right?).
Skills
- Must possess the skills necessary to coach a professional sports team (Eric Mangini is automatically disqualified from applying).
-And deal with thirty girls all having their monthly visitor at the same time, or as I call it, The Plague (Sort of like Mrs. Garrett from the Facts of Life).
I don't really understand the fascination with lingerie football. I understand A) I Like Girls, B) I like Girls Undressed and C) I Like Football. But I don't understand combining the two for any type of visual gratification. That's why God invented hot cheerleaders for. This way you can get an upskirt, while at the same time watching Timmy Tebow crying on the sideline.
But hey, if you do apply and you get the job, hire me, your pal Nudgie. I'm an awesome masseuse, but only for chicks man, only for chicks.
The Nudge Staff
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